My Development

I wasn’t there when I was born, at least not in a cognizant way.  I was told that I came out all bloody, bruised, and with a finger print on my forehead.  That to this day I look at that mark and wonder if what my mother told me was true.

But that is not my point.  When I was born, I had a package in me that was very much undeveloped just as I was as a baby.   I would find out later that that package would not ripen and be ready to open for several years.  Being “totally unaware” of what was happening for a good while after my birth, that package went unnoticed.

They say, experts that is, that we hit the “age of reason” around seven years-old.  Hence, at that magical moment of that monumental event, the package that I was given at birth was opened.  However, it is not opened by me, but rather by those that were left in charge of developing me as a person, supposedly looking out for my best interest.

I was given that package when I was born, just as we all were, and at some point, people started poking at it.

Some said, “there is no package,” others said that they have answers that will help me with my package, and others start to formulate a method of capturing my package and using it for benefits that did not include me.  In other words, others were molding my package.

“Each of us is a ‘musical note’ that can perform in the orchestra of humanity.  That note is like everything else that must be understood and developed so that our note could be included in that orchestra’s movement.  As a human being, we have a responsibility to develop our note in such a way as to improve them.  If this is not done, then the orchestra cannot use our notes, and the consequence is that the orchestra’s capacity is diminished and can never reach its full potential.  We miss the opportunity to be included in the orchestra, and the orchestra loses what we could have contributed.”

The package I was born with is that NOTE – my TALENTS.

The Sumerians had a written language in 3500 BC; I wonder how they taught their children?  Ever since then, educating children has been a hit and miss proposition.  Most likely the talents that was in our package, when we were born, was not overtly developed unless we were part of an elite few that were nurtured intentionally.  By reference, that means very few.

I guess that is still true today.  There are very few methods of developing your talents, through childhood, because it would take concentrated effort to discover them and then work at helping us develop them.

The Greeks taught their children through reason, by asking questions, the Socratic Method.  However, not all children back then were taught that way, only the elite of society could afford that attention by someone that was willing and capable of nurturing children in that manner.

What I have come to understand is that culture, society, and civilization have not succeeded in the aiding in the development of our individual talents.  That is, they have not succeeded in bringing our “note” into alignment with the orchestra.

The fact is that cultures have not cracked the code on how to capitalize on individual talents.   Throughout modern history, man has done a terrible job of helping individuals define and perfect their note, for whatever reason.  When apprenticeship and learning took place in the fields, cottage industries, and farms, that was when an individual’s traits become relevant.

Presently, the one most capable of determining, discovering, and developing your package is you!

It has almost become a cliché; “You are unique, You are special, and You are a genius.”  These statements are true, but they do not encompass the whole picture.

In almost every endeavor, there are things that must be done as precursors to success.  Determining these precursors is where the difficulty arises.

However, you must comprehend that you, in fact, you do have a precious package waiting to be recognized and developed.  That responsibility rest on you to develop your note.  A fundamental education that supplies the basics on which to learn is vital and necessary.  The mix of how much ought to be included in the fundamentals is a troublesome question because the answer depends on the individual and their abilities.  Thus, creating what appears to be a paradox.  Too much fundamental education can inhibit learning, too little leave the person unable to build the tools to grasp the complexities of life.

How does one navigate these paradoxical elements?

Will Smith presented an element in a recent vlog; “associate with those people that build you up.”  There are two kinds of people – lifters and leaners.  Smith suggests, in his video, choose the lifters.

There are numerous factors that affect your developing your talents.  Too many to cover in a short blog.  However, recognizing that you have a package that is precious and that needs to be developed in the first step.

Your goal in life ought to be intentionally directed toward finding, developing your talents or interests, and knowing the reasons why your talents are important.

Once an individual recognizes the importance of these facts and takes on the responsibility to intentionally work for its development, only then will all the other factors come into play.

Steven Covey stated, “Start with the end in mind.”  That is, know where everything is leading to, and then do what needs to be done to make it happen.

An author once stated, “Associate, listen, and read.”  People you associate with will share the factors that brought them insight and information that helped them grow in developing their notes.  Through that sharing, books, and those things you listen to; podcast, conferences attended, and audio records bring you awareness of who you are.

No one can duplicate another’s journey however, elements and factors shared can give insight to how those influences could affect you.  This is the power of association.

Advice, mentoring, and specific information on personal growth must be evaluated to your situation.  This is the scenario of what came first the “Chicken or the Egg?”  How do I know what is relevant to “me” when I do not know who I am?

Here are a few thoughts that can act as a filtering mechanism to clear your mind:

• Admit that you do not know. This leaves you open to searching and learning.
• Your past can be your worse enemy, if it is used as a criterion for future behavior. Rather, use the past to encourage your future action that differs from the past.  In other word, trust that you can accomplish your goals, and let the past errors, failure, or mistakes motivate your future decisions and actions.
• You can get better and move toward excellence regardless of your present circumstances; incorporate a growth mindset. That is, believe you can improve and taking action that encourages enthusiasm towards that belief.
• The things you do today; let them be your choice. You are in control and responsible for all your actions.  Once you get that into your head, then you can improve.  A wonderful thing takes place when you admit you are vulnerable, uncomfortable, and that you do not know everything.   It opens your mind and heart to possibilities unknown to those who think they know it all.
• Take failures and mistakes as stepping stones to excellence, and do not beat yourself up over them. Mistakes are meant for learning not destroying.  Excuses are detrimental to growth, do fall into the trap of blaming someone, or your circumstances for not hitting goals.  Embrace the difficulties you face for what they are, learning opportunities.
• It is your sole responsibility, and no one else can do it. In saying this, I must add that there is an excitement in this realization.  It is risky, but exhilarating.  If you want to gain confidence, take a leap and risk being responsible.  It will hone you in making confident decisions.  Decisiveness is a learned art that must be practiced.

The job of finding your talent is a process that will not take place overnight.  It is hard work though rewarding.  The alternative is to be average and live in mediocrity, second rate, not impressive, not ingenious, or creative.  You become a carbon copy of someone else, a copy that diminished each time a copy is made from a copy.

It all starts with; Do you believe that you have that package?

Many who didn’t start out thinking about their package, through reflection, searching, and meditation found that there is such a thing.  Though it may be crushed, torn, and tattered it’s worth is never diminished.

A mentor, one who cares for you and is interested in your well-being, is invaluable for encouragement during the discovery process.

“When the student is ready, the teacher will appear.”

Being ready is more than a side thought.  Being ready means understanding that you have hidden potential and being willing to do something about it.  Having a hunger to learn and seek advice, and being cognizant that you may be vulnerable, fearful, and that you do not have all the answers is wonderful benefit.

Any publication you read about developing yourself will be lacking in many elements.  This is because the journey of discovery is personal, and it will take you on a unique path.

P.S. The reality is that there are millions of people ranging from 18 – 60 and beyond that have never been able to find themselves.  The teacher never showed up because the student did not know that he had a package to develop.   It is for these people that I am concerned.  Those that never had a chance or the latitude to discover their potential.

The orchestra of humanity has suffered greatly by this.

Attila Horvath, authot

attilahorvath.net